Day 1

After nervous tension for all of last week, the weekend, and most of this morning, I can honestly say that I am one day closer to graduation people!  YUP!  That's right, the countdown has started!  Ok, not really, but I did just complete my first graduate class as a Masters student!  And BOY OH BOY is it a relief!

So far, the professor seems to be approachable, and the students in the class are generally nice. I believe that is the point of going to school and moving and trying something new, to meet people that you wouldn't normally meet walking along the street or working in your job.  Which proves, that although this might be a tough journey, it is one that will bring on new friends (I just made a few - 2 people from WA ironically) and a lot of new experiences.

Today's class proved this point.  We had a "hi my name is.." session where we talked a little about ourselves, and unlike what I thought, not all the people in this masters program were communication majors as undergraduates, and I was not the oldest person in the group, and the group of students (now fondly knows as first years) all have very different paths that they have taken (or reasons for being here) to get to this point in their lives.  There were several people that said that because of the economy, this was the best time for a fresh start...which also made me think about the economy not being a bad thing, but an opportunity...but I doubt everyone thinks that, especially if it made them get laid off, still it is something to ponder.  So the conclusion of my 2 hour and 40 min class is that people, despite the program, and the location, and probably the demographic, all go back to school for various reasons - some right after and others after a while of finding themselves and then wanting (like a marriage vow renewal) a new lease on life and their relationship with it.  I also noted that not everyone, myself included, could put into scholarly terms what they were here for, and believe it or not, like my undergraduate time, the idea of limbo wasn't discouraged....and even more so encouraged, because, as I mentioned before this is a time for self-reflection and self-drive (not that I think that there is such a word).

So overall, I am making friends, and am doing things that I encouraged my students that I worked with to do, aka join join join (EVERYTHING) - I am now a newly dubbed COMGSO (communication graduate student organization) member and have a shirt to prove it!  I am also coming to grips with the fact that, even though I don't have a GTA for this semester, for me, that might be a good thing.  This will give me the opportunity to focus on school first and foremost and essentially "ease" me into what will be my life for the next few years....I guess in reality and in vision, what is meant to be really is MEANT to be, and fate might have a little hand in it.  You just have to trust in yourself and the system....no matter how hard that is.

I have my other class tomorrow and then yet another one on Thursday and then its just a lot of writing and reading, all of which, at the moment I don't mind - YET.  I just keep telling myself, almost as if it was a mantra, that if I put my best out there in the universe then thats all I can do, and I have to be satisfied with that...I just have to believe that if they admitted me (and they did - this being the most competitive year and all for this #1 program in the country...yeah yeah save your applause) that I can and more likely WILL be successful.  the end.

big ups to the bf for putting up with the constant freak-out sessions and the need for him to reassure me that "everything will be ok"...and that people, is why a support system in your life is SO essential!  I wouldn't be here without mine!